To answer your question Whitney Houston, NO. We didn’t almost have it all.
It is important to have goals and dreams. Our passions are what keep us motivated and driven for the amazing things that are destined in our lives. There’s only one catch- you can’t have it all at once. So, don’t beat yourself up with the “Woe is me, nothing can ever be perfect in my life!” because realistically it can’t be the way you want it, all at the same time. Ever notice how when work is going amazing, another area in your life starts to struggle? Or you find that amazing partner, then your career path is not what you wanted it to be? To ‘have it all’ is something reality TV has done a great job at exposing as a fantasy. Even celebrities don’t have it all! There will always be something that falls, needs work or change. The only constant thing in life IS change. There will always be something in your life that you need to dedicate effort and energy to make better. Be okay with working on YOU and your journey for the rest of your life… and make it fun!
I call this the 80/20 rule. There will always be 20% of your life, partner, or job that you may not find ‘perfect’ or the way you wish it to be. It will always be that way. You have to be able to look beyond the small imperfections and see the greater picture. Is the 80% enough for you to be at peace right now? Then accept it for what it is, and love and embrace all the amazing aspects. Soon enough you’ll notice that 20% starts to get smaller, as you no longer are focusing on what’s ‘not right’.
“My greatest strength is that I have the ability to do anything I want, my weakness is that I want to do it all at once”
Sometimes we need to recognize that although our Minds have this incredible power to dream big, push through adversity, overcome struggles and obstacles that we face along our journey, there is still effects on our emotional and physical self when we over-do it. Sure, we’d all love to right now have that major promotion and climb the corporate ladder for the ‘title’; the brand new fully furnished home with white picket fence; that dreamy amazing soul mate who will give us everything we need; and a brand new dream car, because let’s face it- you work hard, you deserve it, right?
The real truth of the matter is that it’s amazing to desire these new aspects to your lifestyle, but to have it all right now is simply unrealistic, and takes major tolls on us emotionally and physically when we try to accomplish it all today. And to be honest- it probably would not be fun. If you did get everything you dreamed of, you would have nothing to work for, and that would become boring.
Here’s my advice… Just like juggling 5 balls in the air, one of them is bound to drop at some point, and it’s exhausting trying to keep them all up together. So instead, pick one ball up at a time, and place it on your plate. Work on it, work towards mastering it, put your energy into it and put as much of your attention into molding it the way you desire. Once you have it in a place that you are content with, allow the ball to maintain its structure and pick up the next one. Think of it like this- if you wanted to bake a cake, would you just throw all the ingredients into a pan that’s sitting in the oven? No. You would take one ingredient a time and add it when needed, in order. That’s life. If you try to just throw everything into the pan all at once, your cake won’t rise. You won’t get the results you’re looking for, and you certainly won’t be having your cake and eating it too.
So pick the most important life change or goal you have, and focus on it. It’s more efficient for you to keep your lifestyle stable while making a major change. This will help keep you anxiety levels down, and rest your body and emotional energy, so you’re ready to give your new journey your all. Granted- when working on a certain goal there are most likely going to be other positive changes that you will naturally want to focus on along the way. Take starting a physical fitness journey for example. When you embark on this journey you will also be more open to making positive changes on your nutrition, stress management, sleep, mental health, just to name a few.
So, YES you can certainly have it all… at different points in life. Just be patient. Life isn’t a birthday party with all your gifts on one day; it’s a series of special occasions where you can celebrate and appreciate your next big ‘thing’. Keep that party hat safe- you’ll be bringing it out for the rest of your life!